Women are much more complex than men. To get pleasure, a lady needs to bring together many factors. And take into account literally everything: candles, pleasant music, and romantic ones may come in handy. And it also happens - last time it was "super cool!", And this time "well, so-so."
Much depends on the so-called "subtext", but what is its essence, says sexologist Vitaly AZUROV.
It is generally accepted that a woman's satisfaction is the result of her partner's hard work. If you tried - fireworks of delights and praise from the chosen one. Skhalturil - the question of subsequent meetings will remain open. In fact, not the most obvious factors are responsible for the woman's excitement - mood, day of the cycle, and even work.
Specialist comment: “In order not to scold your chosen one in vain, first learn, ladies, to determine the sexual context of the day,” says Vitaly AZUROV. - Try to analyze your feelings: behavior, feelings and emotions. To do this, remember the most memorable intimate date and compare it with the one that turned out to be "none." In this case, it is necessary to analyze strictly point by point. Compare your pre-date feelings in both cases. You will have to remember both situations in order to compare the results later. It is better if you prepare two sheets of paper, the first of them will contain answers to the most vivid intimate adventure in your life, but on the second - on the very "so-so".
The first point to start with is your physical and mental health:
Were you completely "fit" or were you sick, undergoing treatment, or have you recently recovered? Did you consider yourself sexy and relaxed at that moment (maybe there were difficulties with the dimensions of your body parts - you gained weight or, on the contrary, lost a lot of weight)? What was the mood? Exhilarated or nervous after a busy day at work and dealing with stress. Or maybe someone was rude the day before? Were you in the mood for sex? Or thoughts about work or problems of relatives or children were crowded in my head?
We will evaluate the partner. Perhaps the best and worst intimacy in your life was with the same person - it happens, because relationships are constantly changing.
If they were different people, remember your emotions from meeting them:
Have you been in love with your partner? Have you been married or have you recently met? Did you trust your chosen one at that time? Or did you have to constantly “keep your feelings in check”? Was your relationship gentle or rather tough with a desire to hurt? Or maybe you did treat each other like old friends? How often have you had sex with this man? And is it always at the request of both sides? Was it not such that you had to "endure" for the sake of another?
Let's think about appearance. It happens that you like blondes, and you get the most vivid sensations only with passionate brown-haired women. Remember your feelings:
Did the scent of this man attract you, did you like his features and body? Was your partner completely healthy, relaxed, or otherwise aggressive and stressed?
Analysis of the situation. Remember exactly where the best and worst intimate date in your life happened and how it went.
On whose territory did you indulge in love - in your apartment-at-with-friends or in a hotel? Who suggested getting down to business? Who seduced whom? Were there any distractions at the time of enjoying the caresses - for example, the phone ringing, empathetic neighbors through the wall? Was your meeting planned, routine, or did it all happen suddenly?
Analysis of sensations.This is the most important point of the "questionnaire" - what exactly did you feel on the approach to the finish line?
Have you thought about your lover or fantasized about someone else? Was your partner affectionate or rather passionate and offered various toys to play with? What parts of your body has the seducer touched more often?"
APPROVE THE BEST SCENARIO FOR TWO
Compare the answers - draw conclusions. So you will find the "golden key" to the cherished "context", which affects the degree of satisfaction with an intimate meeting. And knowing him is not at all a definitive guide for later life. For example, if you figured out that the best intimate moments happened at your home and alone with your most faithful friend, this does not mean that now you need to plunge into the pool of love exclusively in your apartment. That is, it is not necessary to repeat the scenario one hundred percent every time. But this questionnaire helps to find and remember the most correct keys to pleasure.
Specialist comment: “To know your sexual context means to take responsibility for what happens to your body,” emphasizes Vitaly AZUROV. - You will increase awareness, and therefore the quality of sex. If you couldn't reach the peak before”and you were angry with your partner because of this, now you can focus on your own feelings.
Also, the questionnaire helps to understand what exactly you like in an intimate relationship. It so happens that the real passion of a lady is the manifestation of her initiative, or, on the contrary, the dominance of a man. Of course, the wrong turn of events in the surrounding life can affect the depth of emotions. But this time it will definitely not be the husband who is to blame, but the very context."
ITSELF "SUPERMACHO", AND IN DEAL - PSHIK
What if the basic key conditions are met, and the desired feeling is still there and is not? The partner is trying to create something, and you sigh sadly, counting the minutes? This means that the question of the "golden key" has not been resolved by you.
Specialist comment: “Listen to your body, because it gives you hints,” advises Vitaly AZUROV. - You shouldn't concentrate on only one way of receiving joy. Every woman has her own sexuality, as unique as a fingerprint. So don't try to judge yourself by the experience of your friends. We are different - and that's okay. Have fun as you can and as nature dictates. For this, the relationship, of course, needs to be investigated, it is much more effective to do this with a partner, playing the game "like it or not like it." The lover caresses you - and tries to guess whether you like his touch or not.
The next item is your mental health. If you are constantly in a state of stress - whatever one may say - you can forget about orgasm In 80-90 percent of people, stress dulls the physiology. You can cope with stress by allowing the body to complete the cycle it needs to react to it. It is impossible to drown out, hide fear and anger. Therefore, try to trick your brain - do something that relaxes your body - massage, breathing exercises, beauty treatments.
Some ladies cannot relax because of their complexes about their appearance. But only supermodels have truly ideal forms, but even there it was hardly possible without the help of plastic surgeons. If you find yourself dissatisfied with your own appearance, try the following practice: Take off your clothes and stand in front of a mirror. Look at yourself and name out loud the parts to be proud of. It has been scientifically proven that women who have accepted themselves have a stronger orgasm and a more intense desire.
And most importantly - talk to your partners! It also happens that the chosen one considers himself a "supermacho" according to the flattering reviews of the ladies once conquered by him, who then for some reason fled. Of course, it's not worth dramatically lowering him from heaven to earth, but you will have to talk. The main thing is not to start with accusations - "You are nothing in bed", "You do not know how to treat a lady correctly" and everything in the same spirit.Then most likely this meeting will be the last. Better to use "I-messages". For example, "I wanted you to caress me", or "I like it when you kiss here and there, and here."
The main thing - remember, sex is not only a conjugal obligation, but also a pleasant bonus from nature. He cheers up and allows you to exchange emotions, to show love and tenderness in all guises."
Photo - naturalsleepmattress.com