Elena Alshanskaya: "Men Have Never Been In Our Shoes"

Elena Alshanskaya: "Men Have Never Been In Our Shoes"
Elena Alshanskaya: "Men Have Never Been In Our Shoes"

Video: Elena Alshanskaya: "Men Have Never Been In Our Shoes"

Video: Elena Alshanskaya: "Men Have Never Been In Our Shoes"
Video: John Lobb - Care and repair 2024, March
Anonim

Here again, in what circle are discussions about

Image
Image

new waves

accusations of harassment. And, again, leaving out of parentheses the specific situations themselves (I was not there), I am very pleased with the very fact that people have ceased to perceive all these situations as the norm. But not everyone agrees with this. Especially men. Of course, they have never been in our shoes, - writes in

Facebook

Elena Alshanskaya, President of the Volunteers to Help Orphans Charitable Foundation.

A man who has to think about his safety all the time! Will he walk home along a dark street? Will he provoke someone with his skirt? Will anyone misunderstand him? How not to lose your job and get rid of the sweaty hands of the bosses where they should not be to be, etc., etc.?

Men often do not even imagine what a woman's life actually looks like from youth. And how little safety and peace there is. So, many of my friends write with contempt and irritation about the so-called "new ethics". This new ethic makes me very happy (in some places, it does not make me happy where it begins to attack freedom of speech), and I am just terribly upset that it was not there when I was young.

Why, damn it, I had to think, should I go for the night with a cheerful company to visit, if there are men in the company? Because if I go, and I just want to communicate, and they want sex, then the fact that I went to visit someone at night, it turns out, can be automatically regarded as consent (WTF ??).

I remember what a shock at the age of 16 it was for me when in such a get-together someone tried to explain to me that my coming to visit with an overnight stay automatically means something like that. Of course, I sent everyone to FIG, but how many times in the end I broke off and did not go anywhere I wanted, because I did not understand how my arrival would be perceived and how safe it would be there.

Why should a woman be AFRAID of men at all? She should be constantly in tension, in complete control, she should think if her clothes (?!), coming to visit, fun, friendliness, etc. will not be accepted. - as an offer for sex? What good is this "old ethic"? In the culture of silence and the idea of male desire as an essentially uncontrollable dangerous disease. We lived and live in fear of men.

Why? They are sick? Are they incapacitated? Are they devoid of the capacity for self-control?

No, no. This is all the same "old ethics" and male gender socialization makes such "figures of silence" with all these "self-guilty" and "need to think".

I want my daughter to grow up in a society where she didn't "have to think." Where she will not be afraid to walk down the street alone in the evening. Where she will not have to build a fool in front of her superiors, hide her mind or competence. Where no one will grab her ass, and this will not be part of any conventional norms. And the idea of a career through bed will seem like the idea of selling kids to the circus. Where she can freely wear what she wants, walk wherever she wants, make friends with people of any gender, just be friends. And even when he grows up, go to visit them at night, even if they drink alcohol there (if she does, I hope not), regardless of their gender, and imagine, yes, this does not mean ANYTHING.

Where people will ask for consent by mouth and receive an answer by mouth. It's not that hard, really."

Recommended: