When you are abused somewhere in a deserted park, you will try never to pass by this place again. But if it happened at work, you are forced, in spite of everything, to come there again and again. Keep your face and try not to be seen by the person who dared to touch you. Moreover, such a rapist may even order you to make him a cup of coffee. And you will. He'll spice it up while you place the cup on his table. And this is the best case. Because now you already know, you should be afraid of his table. But don't worry. You have already passed the initiation rite. New employees will come. Young and inexperienced. He will be busy with them. And you are waste material. The main thing is to be silent.
Every rapist expects the victim not to speak. No victim, no crime. Still, it is logical. They really prefer to be silent. Perhaps it is fear. Or maybe the desire to quickly forget the disgusting scenes outweighs the desire to be avenged. But all this is exactly until the moment the first one speaks. When it becomes obvious that you are not alone in your humiliation, it becomes easier to speak. And it turns out: "We all have something to remember." This even sometimes leads to the fact that the villain gets what he deserves.
So, journalist Sergei Prostakov, who was accused by several employees at once, after all these tweets, announced his resignation and greedily apologized.
- I want to apologize to all the girls whom I offended, to whom my behavior seemed offensive. I sincerely regret that I behaved this way with you. I never wanted to offend or offend anyone, - he writes, saying goodbye to his post.
Touching, isn't it? Not really.
I turn on a typical girl and start clinging to the words. “To ask forgiveness from girls who thought my behavior was offensive” - seriously? It seemed, then. Apparently, those girls had to be baptized, so it would not seem that some left uncle is trying to climb under the skirt. “I never wanted to offend or offend anyone” is generally an outright lie. At least once in our life, we all wanted to offend someone. And only Mr. Prostakov is free from all human vileness and never wanted anyone. Perhaps he did not mean "anyone" and not "never", but meant his victims, to whom he refers? Then you need to formulate more precisely (you are an editor). Or you need to be a very confident person in order to consider that your harassment is not an insult, but a compliment.
But let's leave alone Sergei Prostakov and others, whose exploits have surfaced in the same way on Twitter. Moreover, such things as harassment or violence from senior managers are not just a story about large companies and huge metropolitan offices. There are plenty of such stories in the outback. And very often it is in the media environment.
Last year, a story about a raped journalist from Veliky Novgorod was thundered all over the country. The editor of the local newspaper also decided that he was higher in rank, with a stronger physique, which meant that he was allowed more. Despite the fact that the city is small, the victim did not become silent, the story received publicity throughout the country. And how many women chose not to wash dirty linen in public, editorial office, office?
Any violence against a woman in our country was perceived as something normal for many years. You could, of course, open your mouth, but only in narrow circles and preferably in a whisper. More recently, our women, beaten and dirty, looked at the overseas miss and Mrs, for whom “undressing with my eyes” is already, in principle, a sufficient reason to sound the alarm or go to court.The Russian woman is very, very much ready to write off the state of alcoholic intoxication (the favorite excuse of all rapists), the costs of education, and retrograde Mercury. But the most delicious thing: I'm probably my own fault?
Of course dear. You and only you. It is your fault that you are attractive, be ashamed of it. It is your fault that the business suit favorably emphasizes your figure. It’s your fault that you stayed at the social event longer than you were allowed and was there when your boss drank. It is your fault that he is not loyal to his wife and that it is not enough for him just to sit in his director's chair - he needs confirmation of power. It's your fault that you can become such a confirmation right on your desktop. And the more you cry and ask not to touch you, the more that heady feeling of permissiveness will be.
Sounds like crazy, right? And how many women think this way when they spend hours trying to wash off the caustic film of the working day from themselves for hours. And even when it didn’t come to the table - sticky glances are also hard to wash off. Vulgar comments. Dirty sentences. All this leaves no trace. You will not appeal to the court with a claim “he looked at me obscenely, straightened a lock of my hair and said that I was appetizing”. They will laugh at the same. So it remains either to be silent, or to break down and shout out a resentment somewhere on Twitter.
Silence is expected from the victims. But if they start talking, it can make a difference. And some girl will come to work in a dress, not fearing that it will be torn. Many will be surprised, but a woman works to provide for herself and help people. But certainly not to become a sexual object.
The promotion does not apply to beautiful office romances, but that's a completely different story.