A Petersburg Woman Who Saved A Girl From Beating Her Ex-husband Told What Was Wrong With Our Society And How This Situation Could Have Been Prevented

A Petersburg Woman Who Saved A Girl From Beating Her Ex-husband Told What Was Wrong With Our Society And How This Situation Could Have Been Prevented
A Petersburg Woman Who Saved A Girl From Beating Her Ex-husband Told What Was Wrong With Our Society And How This Situation Could Have Been Prevented

Video: A Petersburg Woman Who Saved A Girl From Beating Her Ex-husband Told What Was Wrong With Our Society And How This Situation Could Have Been Prevented

Video: A Petersburg Woman Who Saved A Girl From Beating Her Ex-husband Told What Was Wrong With Our Society And How This Situation Could Have Been Prevented
Video: Woman Survives Being Nearly Beaten to Death by Ex-Husband 2024, March
Anonim

Daria Borisova spoke on Facebook about how on March 8, she and her friend saved a woman in a park from a man who had handcuffed her to her. He promised to "cut her into pieces."

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My friends had a stun gun with them - it helped. They took him out of the bag and demanded to release the girl. The man threatened that he was from the 43rd police department and would definitely get them. Sobaka.ru contacted Daria. The woman told how things are now, how the beating could have been prevented and what is wrong with our society.

How does the victim feel? What is the action plan?

The girl is safe now. As far as I know, she was planning to go to the precinct this Thursday. Katya Yavenkova and I, with whom we helped that girl, went to the department ourselves and wrote a statement on Sunday. And on Monday we went and wrote a statement to the UK.

After we filed a statement with the police, the district police officer contacted us. We went to him, and now everything depends on whether the victim comes to him. She should do it on Thursday or Monday.

What do you want to achieve?

We just want everyone to be safe: both that girl and Katya and I.

How do you think you can deal with such situations?

Ideally, deep systemic changes in society are needed. It is necessary to fight stereotypes about women and men - all current gender socialization multiplies a huge number of delusional theses, starting with “beats - it means she loves” and ending with “she is to blame”. Of course, all these changes won't just happen. For a start, it doesn't hurt to put in order the legislation on violence against women - we need to criminalize domestic violence, we need a system of protection orders, we need crisis centers for women.

You see, as a feminist, it is absolutely obvious to me that a "man" now in any case will consider himself entitled to harm a "woman": for this, thanks to the state social policy approving objectification and all these "traditional values".

It is important that both women and men understand that a woman is not the weaker sex, not an adornment of the collective, not an eternal mother, not a free cleaning lady-psychoanalyst prostitute for her husband, not a thing that can be handcuffed to herself. A woman is a strong, interesting and independent person. And the more women realize this, the more we, women, have confidence, strength and will to resist such Tolokonnikovs (the name of the attacker).

Well, our attitude to the police. After all, I quickly believed Tolokonnikov that he had connections with the police (although he was obviously bluffing, perhaps), because anything can happen. And this mistrust of the transparency of law enforcement agencies also makes us think three times before contacting them. Scary - horror!

Is this the first time you've helped another woman in such a serious situation?

Before that, one day I had to approach a couple in which a man, allegedly playing, threw snowballs at a woman at a stop, and then began to push and even grabbed her by the throat - also kind of as a joke. When we approached (by the way, I was also with Katya then), the man smiled: "This is my friend." Then a bus approached, and the woman jumped into it very quickly, clearly not wanting to stay with this “friend”.

How do your loved ones react to the fact that you always go to help? Are they worried?

Not. Is it bad to go to help? Would you help? I would really like to be helped in a similar situation, if it suddenly happened. In general, in our family it is customary to help and not pass by. And loved ones support me.

The problem in my head is that "it is not accepted to interfere, it is more expensive for ourselves." I think it's awful. Well, it's time to start building a civil society!

But now the Internet takes so much time and effort. The TV says so many scary things. Don't you think that because of this it is more and more difficult for society to relate to each other humanly, not to be indifferent?

When in 2010-2011 there was an increase in civic activity, rallies, street actions, the thought very often sounded in my head that "if not us, then who?" Yes, everything is scary around, everything is bad, but you can start small. You don't need to throw your cigarette butts into the street to keep it clean, you can go to protest rallies to be heard. These are some simple things. Though scary every time. But I don’t want to be afraid. I want it to be good.

Nowadays, the fashion for psychologists is developing more and more. Do you think this can have a beneficial effect on society?

Psychotherapy is something that we all need very much. It is sad that there is no culture of psychotherapy in the post-Soviet space. It's the same as going to the dentist. Yes - when something is wrong inside, then all this can burst out, transform into violence in relation to oneself and others. Something tells me that a huge number of family quarrels, fights and murders would not have happened if people had just figured out their internal problems.

It is difficult to imagine a world in which there will be no violence and people will behave like people.

Oh yeah. I, of course, believe in the beautiful Russia of the future, in the victory of gender equality, in the eradication of xenophobia, homophobia and, in general, in all good things. But this does not prevent me before going out into the street to walk the dog, take an electric shock with me.

Have you ever used it to protect yourself? What was the reason for buying it?

No, blessing, I have never used it before. That is, she shocked anyone. It just gives courage. I suppose every woman knows this feeling of defenselessness, when you walk through the gateway in the evening, you hear someone's footsteps from behind, and inside everything shrinks with horror. The shocker is somehow calming. I hope I never have to use it.

Earlier, "Sobaka.ru" published an interview with Bella Rapoport: "Feminism in Russia has grown younger, has become widespread and popular."

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