The essence of the problem can often be seen from the outside. Apparently, this also concerns such a topic as the crisis of the institution of the family in the post-Soviet space. According to statistics, in general, about two-thirds of marriages break up. But what is the reason for this phenomenon?
And in this regard, it is quite interesting to periodically read publications in Chinese publications. Today in the Middle Kingdom there are 30 million more men suitable for marriage than potential brides. That is, purely physically, many have no one to marry.
For many years, special Chinese firms have been looking for potential wives in Southeast Asia. Young girls are offered to marry a Chinese man, move to the PRC, and in return receive all the delights of life in a stable family inside a briskly developing China.
Several years ago, Ukrainian women found out about the plight of Chinese men, writes a journalist for the newspaper Sohu.
Financially, living in Chinese cities has been much better for a long time than in general in "independent", so why not try to experience happiness in an international marriage? The most initiative packed their bags, saved up for a one-way ticket and went to make the men happy on the other side of the world.
However, many Ukrainian women were disappointed there. Yes, the Chinese at first literally admired them. “The Ukrainian women we meet in China are excellent proof that they all have white skin and beautiful appearance. In addition, these blondes with blue eyes, which are so loved by Chinese men, have voluminous and thin facial features. Their figures are even better: slender bodies, sensual curves, everything is enough in the right places,”the article says.
It would seem that in conditions of a shortage of the fair sex, such beauties should be snapped up.
But in reality, it turned out that the girls who came from Vietnam on an ad were all attached, and most Ukrainian women were unmarried in a foreign land.
The author of the publication writes that the main problem is the education of Ukrainian women. They were not created, in his opinion, to create a family. Firstly, they are raised at home like princesses, and in China they show arrogance in society and are generally quite lazy, do not want to work. Simply put, the Chinese cannot get along with the Ukrainian women. “What Chinese family would want to accept such a beauty and keep her at home like a vase? And not even every family can afford to support such a girl,”notes the author of the above publication.
Did China quickly discern something that, perhaps, they do not see at close range in Ukraine or in Russia (our countries are very similar), rushing first to the registry office for a wedding, and a couple of years later to court for divorce?
Alexei Maslov, a China specialist, director of the Institute of Far Eastern Studies of the Russian Academy of Sciences, agrees that building family relations has now become very difficult in the Celestial Empire:
- Chinese men are considered to be very good family men. Perhaps this is their distinctive quality. Many women from other countries, marrying Chinese, are then very happy with the choice. The Chinese take care of their wife's family. They cook food, take care of children, introduce them to kindergarten. That is, they do what women usually do in a European family.
"SP": - Are women in China also different from European ones?
- There are two types of Chinese women.
The first type is such "men in a skirt". They make good money, often run enterprises, even large ones. They completely provide for the family financially, then the man simply serves his wife.
The second type of Chinese wives are soft, pliable, agree with everything. At the same time, we are ready to work for the family.
Russian women, Ukrainian women, Europeans do not fall under any type.The husband provides for the family, fulfills the whims of his wife, but she does not take on the financing of the family.
But as for Ukrainian women in China, in principle it is difficult for them to get a job without preparation. You need to know the language, the mentality of the people, and the confrontation is often not within the family, but between the family and society. The generation of Chinese people from 18 to 30 years old are tightly integrated into the Chinese society in terms of online communication, all kinds of parties. It is really difficult for Europeans in China.
"SP": - Even a clear excess of the number of men does not help.
- It's not all that simple here either. Due to the previous policy of "one family, one child", girls in the village preferred not to register. How many of them - no one knows, some estimate it in tens of millions of people.
"SP": - And the Chinese have to go to fetch brides in neighboring countries.
- Basically, we are talking about Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos. Because of poverty, it is profitable for women from there to marry a Chinese and leave for the PRC. And they themselves are famous for their complaisance, willingness to serve a man.
There is one more important point. Many Chinese men, when choosing a bride, also choose her to take care of the household. And Asian women are usually very good at serving the husband's parents.
European women simply do not understand why they need to work for their husband's parents, cook food for them, go shopping for them, and in general, why live with them. Of course, there is dissonance in the relationship.
"SP": - However, such orders are only within China.
- The most difficult situation arises when a European man is captivated by the beauty of a Chinese woman and takes her to his homeland.
At first, a European thinks that the Chinese woman is very polite and accommodating. But after about two years they become very demanding. In a foreign land, Chinese social norms no longer affect them, and they give free rein to feelings. As a result, many of these families fall apart.