Why Is It Okay To Pay A Woman For A Man?

Why Is It Okay To Pay A Woman For A Man?
Why Is It Okay To Pay A Woman For A Man?

Video: Why Is It Okay To Pay A Woman For A Man?

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An unspoken rule, which has successfully come down to us since ancient times, says: a man must pay for a woman. Dating and other meetings are often structured with this rule in mind. Well, what if you turn the situation around - can a woman pay for a man? And why?

Why did it happen?

This tradition has its origins in ancient times, when women were not allowed to work for paid and, accordingly, could not have their own money. Although then there were problems with the female presence in public spaces - especially on a par with men. Later, with the development of capitalism and the admission of women to the public sphere, their earnings were significantly lower than those of men. This is fully explained by the unwillingness to allow a situation in which the authority of a man as head and breadwinner would be shaken and a threat to the relations of power that existed in society would arise. At the same time, the traditions of “redemption” of women who got married and their subsequent provision as mothers of families among the upper classes of society formed the following practice in etiquette: a woman subordinate to a man and demanded protection as “weak” invariably had to be spared not only from necessity, but also from the ability to make any financial decisions.

Now women are free to decide whether or not to start a family, have children or remain childless, pursue a career or devote themselves to a family - or, if possible, combine these spheres of life. However, the tradition still migrated into our century. But still, why shouldn't a woman pay for a man if she wants to?

Why is it okay to pay for a man?

Because that, too, can be a way to express your sympathy. Especially if for some reason a man cannot, for example, afford a certain restaurant or event, and you would like to spend time with him there. In addition, this can be a great occasion to talk about how each of you understands the relationship in a couple.

Because this will allow him to understand that you probably will not demand from him to comply with stereotypes about a "real man." And it is likely that for him it will be a great relief, and for you it will be a signal that you can try to build a healthy, working relationship with this person, which will not be influenced by various prejudices. But this does not apply to situations where a man perceives your desire and willingness to pay as an opportunity to financially sit on your neck, which usually turns out pretty quickly.

Because this will allow you not to feel obligated to him later and avoid a situation in which a man, if desired, could manipulate his financial investments in your meetings.

Because this is an opportunity to please a person and show him that he is dear to you, especially if we are talking about a long-term relationship and you more or less know the man. After all, who is more dear to you, he or the stereotypes?

Because we can. And if we can, then why not?

I do not mean that a man cannot pay for a woman, and a woman must always pay for a man. I am also not talking about situations where a man requires a woman to pay, although initially there was some other agreement.

The main thing in any situation where the moment of payment appears - whether it is a business lunch, a first date or one of the well-established family traditions - the discussion of this issue by a woman and a man and a common decision that would suit both parties.At the same time, it should be borne in mind that in fact, women in Russia receive on average 30% less than men; there are quite a few single mothers among them who can hardly afford to do this often - or cannot at all; and also the fact that a woman, preparing for a date, usually invests in her appearance much more effort and money than a man, because of much more demanding social standards for a woman's appearance. But that's a completely different story.

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