Nothing surprises us in the 21st century. Transgender people, people with non-traditional orientation, mixing of races - all this is accepted and entered into the norm in developed countries. But the attitude towards people in polyamorous relationships is still ambiguous and sometimes negative.
What is the essence of polyamory?
The main idea of polamoria is the ability to openly be in relationships with several people at the same time, and the participants must know about each other, be not against such an alliance and do without jealousy. It is important to distinguish polyamorous relationships from open relationships. In the latter, a person has the right to have sex with whoever he wants, and this does not affect the very relationship between the two partners. In polyamorous unions, you have to work more on yourself and communication - a person builds close spiritual and physical contact not with one, but with several people at once. It takes a lot more patience, but as a result, a person gets just as much feedback as he wants.
History of polyamory
This kind of relationship is not new to people. Our ancestors, who lived about 8 thousand years ago, practiced polyamory and did not see anything wrong with it. The more partners a man had, the greater the chance of leaving numerous offspring. American anthropologist Lewis Morgan, who studied the ancient Indians, concluded that their families were not "traditional." Friedrich Engels agreed with his idea in his book The Origin of the Family, Private Community and the State.
But why then did people decide that permanent exclusive relationships are better than polyamorous? This could be due to the spread of genital infections; it is also much easier to watch over and protect a family with one wife and children than a family with multiple wives. Plus, it was more convenient to transfer the inheritance than to divide it into parts.
In addition, monogamous relationships were widely praised by 19th century romantic writers as the greatest form of love and fidelity between humans.
American scientist Terry Conley in her research came to several interesting conclusions:
1. People in polyamorous relationships have more friends than monogamous people. They are more likely to keep in touch with their exes. 2. Polyamores are much less likely to experience jealousy. 3. Polyamores are less likely to cheat and practice safe sex more often.
Even taking into account the positive aspects, society does not always accept this type of communication. Monogamous relationships with us have the status of the only correct and even saints, and any deviation is perceived negatively. Research shows that people in monogamous relationships appear to be more successful and happier on the outside.
Some scholars talk about the "crisis of monogamy" in the existing world - the divorce rate confirms that monogamy is no better than other forms of relationships.
But what about the law?
While polygamy - or the relationship of one person with several people, sometimes under duress - is prohibited by law and persecuted (for example, throughout North and South America, China, Europe), with polyamorous relationships is not so simple - they are voluntary. They are not prosecuted, but if the person is already married, then the relationship with someone else is regarded as treason.
Some scholars and activists propose to first accept polyamory as a type of sexual orientation, as was the case with LGBT people, and only then start thinking about the legal side of the issue. In any case, even the fact that polyamorous people began to "leave the closet" and talk about their existence is already a sign of change.