Divorcing Or Not Yet? How To Determine?

Divorcing Or Not Yet? How To Determine?
Divorcing Or Not Yet? How To Determine?

Video: Divorcing Or Not Yet? How To Determine?

Video: Divorcing Or Not Yet? How To Determine?
Video: Straight Talk: Is It Okay to Date While Separated? || STEVE HARVEY 2024, March
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How to determine?

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This year he forgot to wish her a happy birthday. “Is it critical? Maybe I just forgot? " But then separate puzzles - episodes of their life together began to take shape in a common, unpleasant picture. I remembered everything: urgent friendly gatherings, when she urgently needed his help, and the holidays spent without her with her parents, and his trip to Thailand for the last New Year: “There was only one ticket. See you after the New Year. oh well, the main thing is what? That I love you! " And the standard response to a request to talk is: "Let's discuss it tomorrow." A burning resentment inevitably surged, followed by fear. What is it: a crisis in a relationship, or there is nothing left to save? For years people can be tormented by doubts: leave or stay. Meanwhile, you can honestly test the strength of the union. Here are ten criteria by which an outdated relationship is calculated.

Lack of common interests.

This can be safely said if the couple does not pay attention to each other's affairs, there are no joint goals and objectives. Important decisions are made alone, promises made to each other are not kept.

Pushing the relationship into the background.

On the first one can be anything: meetings with friends, hypertrophied concern for parents, workaholism and returning home closer to midnight, passion for computer games, etc. This also includes betrayal of each other. And if the first betrayal can be forgiven (a person made a mistake, made conclusions - with whom it does not happen), then systematic hikes to the left are a sign of a deep crack between partners.

Uncertainty and lack of freedom.

Do you feel free in your relationship? Are you entitled to your opinion? Do you have the right to personal time, hobbies, meetings with other people without a spouse? If not, such a relationship cannot be called lasting and fulfilling.

Lack of acceptance.

For years you have been trying to remake each other, strive to reeducate your partner "for his own good"? An emphasis on his negative qualities, unpleasant features is a sign: you are wasting your time.

Indifference to the opinion of a partner.

The habit of single-handedly making important decisions that affect the relationship in general (for example, large purchases) is a sign of a superficial attitude towards a spouse.

Fundamental differences in life positions.

Who should provide for the family: you, the partner, or both? Who is obliged to take care of the upbringing of children: only the wife, or the husband too? Global disagreements in these and other important issues (joint recreation, shared / separate wallet) are markers of incompatibility.

Personal boundaries.

Do you allow each other to watch the phone, check social networks, rummage through personal belongings? If one in a pair is loyal to such checks, and the other does not accept such checks, this is a serious reason for resentment and conflicts.

Common hobbies.

It is important that the spouses have some points of contact (apart from caring for children or sex): a joint project, business, hobby, favorite TV series, finally. If they are not there, what are you doing together so far?

Differences in sense of humor.

The inability to laugh at the problem, yourself, the situation together is a clear sign of incompatibility.

Physical rejection.

If partners do not give each other sexual satisfaction, they are annoyed by the body odor of the spouse, the imperfection of the figure - it is worth considering: are there feelings in the relationship? After all, when love is present, people are pleasant to each other at all "levels".

Summarize. If in six cases out of ten you answered yes, the relationship in a couple is at risk. Eight answers “yes” - it's not worth keeping them at all: it's time to get up the courage and cut the hated Gordian knot. Yes, it's scary and painful. But holding on to an outdated relationship, you may be losing the chance to meet your true love - a person who would make your life brighter, fuller, more meaningful.

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